Choire survived jury duty but got sick in the process. So I’m here to talk about planes. Take a seat, trains and automobiles. —Matt Stieb
CRAIGSLIST: QATAR
The Mysteries of Donald Trump’s New Jet
What, pray tell, is an “oven goat?”
Qatar has been good to the president of the United States over the past few weeks. Aside from the state-backed deal to build a Trump-branded luxury golf course north of Doha and a $96 billion deal for Qatar Airways to buy Boeing jets, there is the 747-8 that the royal family generously bestowed on him to serve as a new Air Force One. Unfortunately, refurbishing this model will cost millions — which still won't be enough. As Clive Irving writes in his new story for Intelligencer, the “Qatari jet can’t ever be upgraded to meet the mandated requirement for Air Force One that it should be able to repel a missile or drone attack. So forget it being anything other than a gift for the president’s retirement.”
But the aircraft does have one enticing feature in its prospectus — the “oven goat.” Is it a goat for ovens? Is it the greatest oven of all time? Why does a plane need this? I spammed a bunch of private jet-refurbishment companies for an answer, most of which were doing something too lucrative to respond. But according to Ethan Dang, the founder of the PJ-detailing company Onground Systems, the search for the oven goat may be a goose chase:
“We’ve never come across anything officially referred to as an ‘oven goat,’ so it’s very likely a mistranslation or typo. That said, it could be referring to a larger convection oven capable of preparing goat, which is a common traditional dish in the Middle East. Most ovens we see on aircraft are quite compact with minimal rack space, or they’re just microwaves, neither of which would be large enough to accommodate something like that.”
But if it does exist, it would probably excel in heating up a Big Mac.
AIRING OF GRIEVANCES
What Are Your Extremely Specific Beliefs on Exercise Etiquette?
It’s time to complain, folks.
I’ve been enjoying all the workout psychoses that our writers have been exploring this year. Makeup at the gym is fine, but you can’t take videos of yourself looking hot. Running clubs need to run off a cliff. No fellas at Solidcore. So I’d love to hear your niche thoughts on the dos and don’ts of exercise. I’ll start: Lifting in jeans is awesome, and I will never stop doing that.
Click Your Way Out
Remember: Working out in jeans — good. Swimming in jeans — bad.






yes. Glad for the gift to our country.